Blah.

Will I ever be happy with my body?

This morning, while I was getting dressed I was not displeased when I looked in the mirror. Even naked I look so-o-o-o much better than before.

Fast forward to this evening - Ian wanted to go to the pool. Mind you - I didn't put on my suit, I just didn't feel like dealing with it. So, I'm sitting in the shade in a pool chair, and I look down and my tummy is all poochy. And I get self-conscious and I'm hating my tummy. Now, I think everybody's tummy is poochy when they're sitting, so why does it bother me?

But there I sat - full of negative self-talk. I did talk my way out of it, but it bothers me that it was there - lurking - waiting to come out.

It probably didn't help that dinner was blah. Tasteless spaghetti with meatsauce. I ate enough to make it through the pool excursion and we threw the rest away. I came home and made a bowl of oatmeal and that helped. The boys shared a pizza.